#28 - The Experiment

  My name is Aximili-Esgarrouth-lsthill.

  It is not a human name. It is an Andalite name. Not that humans reading this are likely to know what an Andalite is. I am the only one here on Earth.

  No, that is not completely true. There is one other. But he is not the Andalite he once was. He is now the host body to the Yeerk who holds the rank of Visser Three. Andalites call him the Abomination. My duty is to someday destroy him.

  I am only an aristh, a cadet. But as any Andalite who ever reads this will know, Andalite custom demands that I avenge my brother's death. Elfangor was a warrior and prince. Visser Three murdered him. I suppose I thought that Elfangor would live forever. He was fearless. Honourable. Perfect. It was a lot for a brother to live up to because I am not any of those things.

  But the memory of my brother is why I look forward to the day when I destroy Visser Three. It is not simply a matter of duty. I cared very deeply for my brother.

  And I am not the only one who wants to destroy him and the other Yeerks who have invaded Earth. Before he died, Elfangor gave five human youths the power to morph. As well as the truth about why they need this power. Now these five humans are the only ones resisting the Yeerk invasion. Fighting to stop the Yeerks from enslaving the entire human race. Fighting to stop them from crawling into human brains and taking over all thoughts, actions, and memories.

  They are also the only ones who know about me.

  They are my people now - the only people I have here, so far from home. I am grateful for their friendship. I respect them, too, which might be more important. But Tobias is the only one I might consider a true shorm. A shorm is a deep friend, someone who knows everything there is to know about you. The word comes from the Andalite's tail blade, which looks something like what you may know as a scorpion's tail. A shorm is someone you would trust to put his tail blade against your throat. Even though Tobias does not have a tail blade - or hooves, stem eyes, and fur, the way Andalites do - he is almost one of us. Elfangor was his father, and, as strange as it is to think of, I am, in Earth terms, Tobias's uncle.

  But I think it is the fact that he is almost as unique on this planet as I am that makes us close. Choosing life as a red-tailed hawk has set Tobias apart from everything he once knew.

  We are both unique on this planet, and both very much alone. There are times at night, as I search the dark sky for the home star, when I think about my real people, my family. I think about a life that might have been very different from the one I am living now, here on a distant planet, far from everything I once knew.

  The others, Prince Jake, Cassie, Rachel, and Marco, all have homes and families. Only Tobias and I do not. Tobias lives in a meadow that is his territory. And I, until recently, did not even have that limited amount to call my own.

  But now I have made my life a bit more comfortable. I have constructed a sort of scoop - what we Andalites consider to be a home. Like any scoop, it is mostly open, with only a small area covered by a semi spherical roof. And in my case the scoop had to be very small so that I could fold the roof down and erase all visual evidence of it. I had only a few things in the scoop. A World Almanac that my friends had given me. A photograph of a delicious cinnamon bun. Some human clothing. And one other thing only recently acquired. One very important other thing that has changed my life.

  A television.

  television. Or as most humans say, TV.

  Ah, yes: TV!

  I never expected it to be so compelling. At first I thought it would only be useful. I would watch the behaviour of the humans on the flat, square screen and listen to them speak. When I am in human morph, I need to be able to seem entirely human.

  But it is so much more than merely useful. It is a window into the human soul. Technologically it is laughable, of course, but when you take into account the stunning array of programs, it rivals the cinnamon bun itself as the finest creation of human society.

  Tobias, too, enjoys TV. He comes every day to

  watch a show with me. It is called The Young and the Restless. It is very educational, though I remain confused as to the cause of so much restlessness.

  TV allows me to observe much more human behaviour than I see at the mall. I am still wondering why humans put their mouths together. And why they seem to enjoy it. My first thought was that they were transferring food. But that seems not to be the case.

  I pointed at the screen.

  His hawk eyes were trained on the little screen as Victor tightened his arms around Nikki.

 
  Tobias rearranged his wings noisily.

  I said.

  Tobias said. Tobias is competitive when it comes to his senses. His hearing and sight are both better than mine. But I am able to look in all directions simultaneously, something he cannot do.

  I said.

  Tobias countered.

  "Nothing likes the joys of daytime TV, huh?" Marco said, stomping up through the underbrush.

  I said to Tobias.

  Marco grinned at me. "Snuck up on you, didn't I?"

  Tobias said tolerantly.

  Marco laughed. He knew he had not surprised us. His claim to have snuck up on us was human humour. It is inexplicable, and Andalite readers should simply resign themselves to never understanding.

 

  "Hey, I can't be controlled by 'the man's' arbitrary schedules. I come and go as I please. I am free. No one holds me down."

  Tobias said.

  "Yeah, they let us out early. So. What's on the tube? Is this . . . Whoa! Who's that? And does she always walk around wearing a towel?"

 
  See you, Ax-man. Later, Marco,> Tobias said, and then he spread his wings and was gone.

  "Watching a soap, huh?" Marco said, nodding his head.

  I was confused.

  Marco sighed. "Whatever you call it, it basically reeks, you know. I think it's time I introduced you to some better programming, Ax. Buffy. Party of Five, maybe. Cops. South Park. Something, anything better than this. Although she is hot."

 

  "Yeah, well, I think you may have your cause and effect turned around there. Hey, you know what you need? A TV Guide."

  I bristled.

  "Take it easy!" Marco held up his hands. "Everything with you has got be literal. TV Guide is a little book that tells you what shows are on, and when. Come on, I'm bored. Let's cruise."

  The notion of a guide to all that TV had to offer was attractive. But I would have to morph my human form to go into the town.

  I suggested.

  "Why not? Maybe we'll run into Jake at the mall. He can buy." Every morph is a surprise. The last time I morphed to human, my own more or less humanoid parts, my head and arms, changed last. This time they were first.

  I felt teeth growing beneath my lower face. In fact, my entire human mouth, consisting of a hinged jaw, teeth, tongue, and saliva-producing glands, was fully formed before lips appeared.

  Lips form an open hole in the bottom third of a human face. The hole is used for eating and for forming mouth sounds. As well as kissing, spitting, vomiting, and belching.

  Humans do a great deal with their mouths, most of it rather pointless. My more numerous fingers disappeared, melting into ten stronger, thicker human fingers. My stalk eyes retracted into my head, leaving me unable to see behind me without either turning my head or turning my entire body. My front legs shrivelled away, leaving me to perch precariously on my two hind legs. Of course, humans have only two legs, and no tail at all. So they go through life constantly on the verge of falling over. My blue fur was the last to go, replaced by my own particular shade of human skin. Human skin

  comes in a variety of shades, none of them attractive. At least not to me. If you are a human, you must find something attractive about your fellow humans. Humans who are young and restless are almost continuously in a state of attraction to others. When I was fully human - awkward, slow, and devoid of natural weapons I put on my artificial skin. Humans call it clothing.

  "I am ready," I said, making mouth sounds. "R-r-r-ready. Red. E. Red. E."

  "How about putting on a shirt?" Marco asked.

  "The men who are young and restless do not wear shirts. I am young. And I am occasionally restless."

  "Ax?"

  "Yes, Marco?"

  "Put on a shirt."

  I did. Then I folded my scoop down so that nothing, including the TV, would be visible. Not even to a human walking directly over the spot. I walked with Marco out of the woods, across the farthest fields of Cassie's farm, and toward the mall. It took a long time. Humans wa lk very slowly, a result of having only two legs and no tail. We crossed fields and then walked along a street - a path for cars. Then

  . . .

  "Well, hello, Marco. Hey, Ax," someone called. Marco stopped short and looked around, turning his entire human head in order to see in different directions. "Who said that?"

  "Here, Marco."

  I turned my human head to follow the voice. It was a truck painted with the word "FedEx." And it was talking to us.

  What is this, Candid Camera?" Marco said.

  "No. I believe it is a hologram," I said. It was the logical explanation. Trucks - which are large-wheeled vehicles used by humans to transport what they call "stuff" - do not have the power of speech. And in any case, I recognized the particular qualities of that voice. Marco made a disgusted face. "Hologram? Is that you, Erek?"

  "Who else? Come on in. You're not being watched."

  "There's a woman right across the street looking at us!"

  "She's one of us, Marco," Erek said.

  Marco and I walked directly into the side of the truck. I stepped through the blue and red letters to see Erek King.

  He was not in his usual guise as a human boy, since he was using his holographic emitter to create the truck. Instead he appeared as the Chee android he really is.

  The Chee are a race of highly sophisticated androids created by a race called the Pemalites. The creators are gone. Only their creations remain, posing as humans.

  The Chee are programmed with specific traits. Non-violence is one of those traits. And as much as Erek despises the Yeerks, and as powerful as he is, he must limit his anti-Yeerk activities to espionage. He and his fellow Chee are quite effective in that area.

  "A Federal Express truck?" Marco said. "Isn't that copyright infringement?" Erek formed a metallic grin. "They can call my lawyer: He was Moses' law professor."

  The Chee are also very, very long-lived.

  "I have news," Erek said, serious now.

  "Well, I didn't think you set this up to invite us over for pizza," Marco muttered.

  "Let him speak, Marco," I said gravely, touching his arm. Jack, who is one of the youngest and most restless, does this often, when he is trying to be understanding. Marco and Erek stared at me.

  "The Yeerks," Erek said finally. "We've learned they've used several fronts to purchase an animal testing laboratory and a meatpacking plant."

  "Huh?"

  "A meatpacking plant?" I repeated. "Meeeeet? Meeeetpacking?"

  "It's where humans take animals - cows, pigs, chickens - to be slaughtered and then packaged for sale in the supermarket," Erek explained.

  "Are you telling me I should worry about where my next Big Mac is coming from?" Marco said.

  "We're not sure. We don't really know what they're doing with either facility. But we do know that they were purchased at about the same time, so we're certain there must be a connection."

  "When did they acquire these facilities?" I asked him.

  "Fa-sill-it-tees." It was a good word for mouth-sounds. So many syllables.

  "About a year ago." Erek shook his android head. "Unfortunately, we just learned about the purchase. The Yeerks are being extremely secretive about these projects."

  Marco sighed. "You know, Erek, bumping into you is never a picnic. Why do we care if the Yeerks want to make burgers for a living?"

  "I don't know," Erek admitted. "Maybe you don't care. But the Yeerks wouldn't be this secretive if it were nothing to worry about."

  "You said they also had a laboratory," I prompted. "What is its purpose?"

  "Don't know that, either."

  "Let me ask you this: How about if we just forget all about this and don't tell Jake, and we all go to the mall and see how many cinnamon buns Ax can eat before he explodes?"

  "I have already performed that experiment," I said. Marco nodded. "Okay, then I guess we go tell Jake and the others and launch off into some dumb mission that'll end up with me screaming and running for my life. Sound good?"

  "You could always go catch a burger instead," Erek said brightly. Marco shook his head bitterly. "They're messing with the burgers, man. Now it's definite: The Yeerks must be destroyed." J. had planned on an afternoon and evening of watching TV. But Rachel assured me that on Tuesday there was never anything on.

  "Nothing but lame sitcom reruns this week," she said. "You're not missing anything."

  I pointed out.

  "These what?"

 

  "You're starting to scare me, Ax."

  In any case, Prince Jake had decided that we should act immediately to discover what, if anything, the Yeerks were doing at the animal testing laboratory and meatpacking plant.

  We had all assembled at Cassie's barn to prepare for the mission. Cassie's barn is called the Wildlife Rehabilitation Clinic. She and her father offer medical treatment to injured nonhuman animals. Nonhu-man animals filled cages all around us. Many of them were creatures I had morphed.

  When I say we "all" assembled, I mean, of course, Prince Jake, our leader, a male who is distinguished by being taller than the others; Rachel, a female who is considered beautiful by humans and held in awe by her fellow Animorphs for her bravery; Cassie, the most knowledgeable and gentlest of the group; and Tobias, Marco, and me.

  Six of us. All with morphing power but very little else to oppose the Yeerk invasion of Earth.

  It is an impossible situation, of course. But it has been impossible from the start. And we are not dead yet. If I were dead, I could hardly be expected to be communicating.

  That was humor.

  I believe.

  Tobias demanded from his perch in the rafters.

  "What, you're asking me?" Marco said. "Like I know? Erek just said they have this lab where they do animal testing and this meatpacking plant. That's all I know."

  "Well this is just stupid," Rachel commented. "Meat? Animal testing? Why?"

  "They're cleverly infiltrating Mickey D's to learn the secret of

  'special sauce,'" Marco said.

  "Mayonnaise, catsup, and relish," Rachel grumbled. "Big secret."

  "Poison the food supply?" Cassie suggested as she forced a medicine down the throat of a goose. "Kill a lot of people?"

  I said.

  Everybody turned to stare at me.

  "Well. There's a happy thought," Marco said with what I believe is a tone of voice called "sarcasm."

  "We won't get any answers sitting around here guessing," Prince Jake said. He sighed. "Rachel? I am messed up in old lady Chambers's class. Did you take decent notes?"

  "Yeah. I can E-mail them over to you after we get back. But it's like a whole bunch of stuff."

  Prince Jake sighed again and rubbed his eyes. "Okay look, let's go get this over with fast or

  I'll end up spending the weekend doing a makeup paper, which would seriously stink."

  "What exactly are we doing?" Cassie asked.

  "We're just going to take a look at this animal testing lab. See what's what."

  I asked.

  "They get a bunch of animals together and give them quizzes from magazines," Marco said. "You know, like 'How Shy Are You?' and 'Is He Mr. Right?'"

  I hesitated before responding. It was probably humor.

 

  "No one ever is," Rachel said with a laugh.

  "Animal testing labs are facilities where humans use species similar to our own to test the effects of drugs or whatever," Cassie said. "They have to see if something is safe for humans, so they see first if it's safe for animals."

  I began to say. But Cassie was not finished.

  "They are also about as close to hell as anything humans create," Cassie said.

  "Uh-oh. Here we go." Marco groaned. "Quick! Everyone find a tree to hug."

  "Look, I'm not a fanatic on this," Cassie said. "I'm not against testing some new AIDS drug or a cancer cure. But there are labs where makeup is tested, only they test it in ways that cause the test animals to go blind. And even when they test for serious stuff, they should try to make the animals' lives a little less horrible."

 

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