Shameless expectations, p.20
Shameless Expectations, page 20
“Oh. No.” Athena brushed her fingers against Monti’s cheek, then her lips. “That’s exactly what I want.”
“Tell me if you want to stop.”
Their mouths pressed together hard. Monti kept her fingers flat against Athena, bringing them back into the moment and out of the technicalities of sex for the first time with someone new. She deepened the kiss, sliding their tongues together, pressing their bodies tight. When Athena relaxed, when she dropped her hips and moaned, Monti finally made her move.
She dipped her fingers between Athena’s hot and swollen lips, finding her slick and wet. She pressed slowly, backing away on a tease and then pressed again. Athena keened, her arms tightening in a grasp around Monti’s shoulders as she bit Monti’s earlobe and then her neck, sucking hard. Monti swallowed, wetting her thumb.
Slow circles. Teasing circles. Monti counted to ten, then fifteen, then twenty before Athena bit her neck hard.
“Stop teasing already,” Athena said into Monti’s shoulders. “I told you what I want.”
“You did,” Monti answered, biting back her smile. She started with one finger. She pushed slowly inside, past the tight circle, and straight to her second knuckle.
Athena bucked her hips. “Yes.”
Monti kept the motion with her thumb, making sure that she was teasing and distracting in every way she possibly could. This was only the beginning, she knew that, and it was such a glorious way to start.
“More,” Athena demanded. “I need more.”
Monti moved her finger in and out, but Athena clenched her eyes and shook her head back and forth.
“No. Another finger.”
Doing as she was told, Monti slid in a second finger. Athena groaned and pressed their mouths together in a sloppy kiss as if she was drunk off the pleasure. Maybe she was. Maybe Monti had found the last key that Athena needed to unleash everything. Athena dug her nails into Monti’s shoulders as she clutched her back.
Monti stroked Athena’s clit as she slid her fingers in and out. She watched with rapt attention as Athena closed her eyes and bit her lip.
“More.”
She added a third finger, the tight circle of Athena’s body straining under the intrusion and hugging Monti’s fingers. She moved slowly, not wanting to cause any pain or harm. Athena’s hips jerked sharply, only this time Monti had no doubt it was from the pinnacle of pleasure Athena was about to reach.
Athena’s breathing increased, her lips parted, and she was lost. Monti held her here to reality, but that was it. The one thread that could send her away and pull her back. Monti pressed her body in, keeping as tight a hold as she dared. Athena jerked again, then again. She cried out, her chest coming forward as all that pleasure that had been building pulsed through her.
Monti stayed with her. She eased her through everything, pressing kisses against her neck and cheeks and lips as she waited. When Athena opened her eyes, when she looked directly at Monti, she shook her head with a loud laugh, one that was completely free.
“You stopped running,” Athena stated so simply.
“So did you,” Monti answered.
Laughing again, Athena kissed Monti fully on the lips. Monti kept her fingers firmly inside Athena for as long as she could, enjoying the way Athena moved against her, not confined, not weighed down.
“What’s next?” Athena answered, eyes bright with curiosity.
“We land in Dallas.” Monti kissed her quickly. She finally pulled her fingers away and put them in her mouth, cleaning them. Her eyes fluttered shut as the flavor blossomed on her tongue. Damn, they would have to do that next. When she opened her eyes, Athena gave her a curious look.
“Do I taste good?”
“Like heaven.” Monti winked. She shifted away, uncomfortable, especially knowing they had at least another four hours before they landed in Florida and got to Athena’s beach house and she could take care of that very poignant discomfort. “Fix up your clothes, and I’ll meet you back at our seats. We should be landing soon.”
“Monti?” Athena snagged Monti’s fingers.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t give up on finding peace yet.”
Monti’s breath caught in her throat at the serious expression in Athena’s eyes. There was nothing she could say or do that would alter this moment. Nodding slowly, Monti let go of something. She wasn’t quite sure what it was yet. But Athena took it away so easily.
“I’ll see you in a few minutes,” Monti said, needing to escape. She wasn’t ready for what she saw in Athena’s eyes. Neither of them were.
twenty-four
“Do you mind if we go on a walk?” Athena asked as she wrapped her arm around Monti’s back.
She’d been doing that more and more lately, especially since she’d fallen asleep on Monti’s shoulder on their flight from Dallas to Miami. The drive to Marathon had been easy, and Athena had gladly let Monti take the wheel on that one. She’d never quite enjoyed driving, and spending hours navigating traffic was stress she loved avoiding.
“Sure.” Monti slid her arm along Athena’s shoulders.
They walked like that, as if it was so easy and had always been that way. Athena adored it. Things were so simple with Monti in ways they shouldn’t be. But feeling with her, trusting her, being with her was easy. Athena sighed and nuzzled her cheek against Monti’s shoulder and let Monti lead the way onto the beach.
It was so easy not to be in control when Monti was there. Well, at least this kind of control.
“You seem more relaxed here,” Monti commented.
“I’m not sure if it’s the place or the company,” Athena answered, trying to be as honest as possible. She hadn’t been able to decide which it was. Either way, Monti was right. She was relaxed. She was happy. And for the first time in as long as she could remember, she was enjoying herself.
“Well, I do like to hear that.” Monti dropped a kiss into Athena’s hair. “I’m glad to be off the plane and out of the car.”
Athena chuckled. “I used to enjoy traveling. I still do, but it’s a lot more stressful now than it used to be. Well, before everything happened.”
“Where did you travel?”
“All over.” Athena smiled, her foot sinking into the rough sand of the beach as they stepped toward the sunset. They’d gotten there just in time to see the sun fall below the horizon. The air would start to chill them soon and they’d have to go inside, but listening to the quiet waves on the beach was idyllic.
“What was your favorite place?”
“Kathmandu.” Athena smiled. “I only went there once, and I didn’t get to explore for long. I wish I’d been able to climb up in the mountains and explore the surroundings a bit more, but I was short on time.”
“When were you there?”
“I must have been twenty. Kevin and I went for a late summer trip.” Grinning, Athena turned and glanced up into Monti’s eyes, but Monti’s look faltered slightly. Her face seemed to fall. “What did I say?”
“I’m glad that Kevin has been able to be there for you throughout your life. It must be wonderful to have a friend like him.”
“He’s family.” Athena slid her hand down Monti’s arm and twined their fingers together. “He’s always been family.”
They walked a few more paces down to the beach, just feet from where the water was rushing toward them, and stopped. Athena shivered slightly and sidled in closer to Monti.
“Don’t you have someone like that? I just assumed Fallon…”
“Fallon liked to pretend she was my mother. That caused a lot of arguments.” Monti frowned. She stilled, staring out into the ocean in front of them.
Athena watched everything she could about this intriguing woman. They were both going through a magical transformation, but Athena had no idea where Monti was in the midst of hers. Was she toward the beginning still? Athena’s had seemed to take off like a slingshot and it was impossible to stop it now.
“I hated her, growing up.” Monti laughed. “She was always trying to boss me around, tell me what I could and couldn’t do. I was so happy when she was going to go to college, and then she decided to go to University of Puget Sound and commute. I was so mad.”
“You thought you had your getaway.”
“I did!” Monti laughed again. “God, she was a terror.”
“I can see how that might have happened.” Athena ran her fingers up and down Monti’s arm. “She commands my office, and most of my life that I’ll allow her—”
“Which I assume isn’t a lot,” Monti chimed in.
“My schedule primarily. But she’s very good at keeping everything orderly and on track.”
“Did she tell you that she lies to me about what time our appointments are so that I show up on time and you don’t know that I’m late?”
“What?” Athena’s eyes widened, shaking her head. “No, but I suppose that does make sense. She would think of something like that.”
“I can’t wait for the day she ends up in love with someone who’s perpetually late and flies by the seat of their pants. She’ll never hear the end of it.” Monti turned, facing Athena. She reached forward and cupped Athena’s cheek. “Thank you for bringing me on this trip. I needed a bit of an escape.”
“An escape from Fallon?”
“Some of it was that. Some of it is just someplace new to explore.” Monti moved in for a swift kiss.
“But you said you’d been to the Keys before.”
Monti narrowed her gaze. “There’s always somewhere new to find an adventure. Don’t you think so?”
“I suppose.” Athena hadn’t thought about that before. Ever since the event, she’d only ever gone to places she was familiar with, where she knew her surroundings and where the fastest exit was. She wasn’t ever comfortable elsewhere. She’d managed to calm her fear enough to function in society, but she’d become a recluse, when before she’d always been the first to hop on a plane and visit someplace new.
“We should go in. You’re shivering.”
“Yeah.” Athena led the way into the house through the patio doors.
She showed Monti around the first level before bringing her up the stairs to show her the bedrooms. She’d specifically chosen Monti’s room to be right next to hers. When she opened the door, she leaned against it and waited for Monti to walk inside to check it out.
“I didn’t want to assume anything.” Her cheeks were flushed, the memory of the plane ride coming back full force. She’d wanted to find some place in Dallas to sneak away, but the conversation they’d been having was so good that she didn’t manage to bring the idea up. And then they were here and driving.
Monti touched her shoulder. “I get it.”
“Right. My room is next door if you need something.” Athena kept her back plastered to the door, her hand on the knob. She had no idea what to say or do or how to even begin a seduction to the level that Monti had earlier that day.
“Oh, I’m sure I’ll need something at some point.” Monti stepped in closer, pressing Athena against the doorway. Their breasts touched through the fabric of their clothes.
Athena’s eyes fluttered shut, the ghosting memory of Monti’s caresses filling her mind. She drew in a shuddering breath, wanting that as much now as before. But surely Monti would expect her to touch in return at some point, wouldn’t she? Sex was hardly ever just one way, but more than that, Athena wanted to reciprocate.
Monti pressed a kiss to Athena’s cheek, then along her jawline to her ear. “I think I could use some help with this.” Monti put her hand against Athena’s jacket, the one she’d promptly put back on as soon as she’d returned to her seat from the bathroom. The buttons came undone in seconds, and Monti slid her hand around Athena’s side to her back. “Oh would you look at that, I didn’t need help.”
“Cocky,” Athena mumbled. She moved slightly, pressing her mouth to Monti’s cheek, then her neck. She scraped her teeth much like Monti had and settled into what teasing she could do in that moment, what she was comfortable with. Athena sucked, sliding her tongue against the skin at the base of Monti’s neck while she trailed her hands up and down Monti’s sides.
“I think you like me that way.” Monti moaned lightly. “That feels so good, by the way. Not just your mouth, but the way you’re touching me.”
The compliment spurred Athena on. Were they really going to pick up right where they left off?
“Monti?” Athena finally managed to ask.
“Yeah?” Monti pulled back to look Athena in the eye, the curiosity and timing precisely what Athena needed in that moment.
How did Monti always seem to know that? How did she always seem to follow the cues Athena wasn’t even sure she was giving? “I think I’d like to freshen up first. I always feel so dirty after flying.”
Monti chuckled. “I get it.” She leaned in and kissed Athena, tangling their tongues in a quick, heated kiss before she backed away with a few more touches of lips to lips. “Go, do whatever you need to do. I’ll be waiting for whatever you’re ready for.”
“Whatever?” Athena pushed, cascading her hand purposely down the front of Monti’s body, over the swell of her breasts, to the curve of her waist, and the slope of her hip.
“Yes, whatever. Whether it’s sex, kissing, cuddling, massaging.”
“I can always go for another massage.”
Monti laughed, the sound freely echoing through the room. “I’ll give you a massage whenever you want.”
“What if I want one in the middle of the night?” Athena pulled Monti back to her by the belt loops in her pants.
“Well, then definitely.” Monti’s voice dropped, the tones seductive and arousing.
Athena bit back her smile, but barely. She was enjoying this side of Monti, and of herself. She’d never been the flirtatious type, at least not in recent memory. She was almost coming back into the person she used to be.
“What about at dawn? On the beach?” Athena trailed her fingers up Monti’s stomach, reaching for her breasts and circling them.
“On the beach? Don’t you think that’s a bit public?”
“And the bathroom on the airplane isn’t?”
“That has a locked door.”
“True.” Athena looked up into Monti’s eyes. “Are you sure you won’t mind?”
“Anywhere and whenever, Athena. The choice is always yours.”
“Good to know.” Athena dragged Monti back in for another kiss, humming her pleasure so Monti would know exactly what she was feeling and how much she was loving this. Eventually, she slowed the embrace and nipped Monti’s lower lip, sucking a little, before finally releasing her. “I should go shower.”
“Probably. Otherwise you might not make it there.”
“Is that a threat?”
“A fun one.” Monti put her hands up by her sides and took a step backward. “Go on. I’ll be here waiting when you’re done.”
Athena debated whether or not to actually leave. She was enjoying their time together so much that she didn’t want to break the spell. With one last kiss, she slipped from Monti’s hold and walked to her bedroom. Closing the door with a definitive click, she locked it and put her forehead against the cold wood.
What was going on with her?
It was like she’d never had sex before in her life. She couldn’t get enough of Monti, of the touches, of her kisses, or the teasing. Smiling, Athena shuddered. She was ready to go again and again if only Monti would let her. And for some reason, the fear she’d had before about what to do and where to touch was mostly gone.
Although she was pretty sure that it’d come back full force as soon as she was put into the situation that sex, real sex, was actually going to happen. Athena dragged in a slow breath, steadying herself. She really needed to get into the shower.
Stripping off her clothes, she folded them as she went. Settling them into the laundry basket in the en suite, Athena started the water and let it warm up. She studied herself in the mirror. She almost didn’t even recognize the woman she’d become. She’d aged since the last time she’d truly looked at herself, the wrinkles around her eyes and lips far more prominent.
She was a middle-aged woman, no doubt about it. Her father had retired when he turned fifty-five, and she only had ten more years to reach that. Though she hadn’t planned on retiring any time soon. She was happy with her workload, but more importantly, she was happy with the work she was doing.
Helping people find justice.
Athena sucked in a sharp breath. Perhaps her justice was simply living and finding joy in the life she’d been handed. That would certainly tilt her whole world on its axis in a new way. But today she’d been touched, and she had enjoyed every single moment of it. Every single glide of fingers against skin. She’d loved having Monti inside her, consuming her, possessing her.
Closing her eyes and leaning over the counter, Athena let the lingering sensations float through her. She hadn’t even been self-conscious about what she looked like. The thought hadn’t even flown through her brain that Monti would care or that it would make a difference.
Athena straightened her back, this time seeing herself in the mirror anew. She didn’t want to be who she’d become over the last twenty years. She wanted to be that girl from the past. Maybe not that girl exactly, but she wanted to experience life with such joy and excitement and fervor as she had. Rubbing her hands together, Athena stopped.
Why was she still wearing her wedding ring?
She’d rarely ever taken it off, but it wasn’t like Kevin wore his. She frowned at it, sliding it from her finger and staring at the large diamond that had been passed down through six generations after being won in a gambling match. She’d never liked it. Never appreciated the family significance behind it. Spinning the ring in her fingers, Athena dropped it into the small jewelry bowl on the counter.
Enough was enough.
It was time for her to become someone new.
Someone she’d always wanted to be.
Someone who made her own rules.
Athena showered quickly, drying off and slipping into loose-fitting and comfortable clothes. She walked out of her bedroom barefoot and immediately went next door, only to find Monti asleep on the bed. Her hand was tossed over her head, one leg dangling as if she was about to stand up, but her gentle breathing and soft snore were sure signs that she was fast asleep.
